A couple of hours of blogging does NOT mean you know me…..

It’s quite a story, all of the things that have happened over the last month since my last blog post.

People ‘friending’ me on my FB page only to ‘spy’ and ‘track’ and ‘monitor’ what I’m doing and watching me help women thinking of placing their children, and informing them of ALL of their options.
People getting upset with what I’m doing because, in their mind…..my ‘numbers’ of the women I’m speaking with are more positive on the parenting side, than on the placing side.
To these people, I’m taking babies right out of their arms, or because of my personal situation, providing ‘biased’ information, and because I will never ‘expose’ and bring attention to the women that help, they don’t know the ‘thank yous’ I receive regularly for the ‘non-biased’ and helpful support that I have provided them – from both those who have placed and who have decided to parent.
A ‘pack’ of these people who are APs/PAPs and HAPS banded together copying my blog, watching as I found more things that made me realize even more than before that all the reasons for placing my son were so temporary and in some cases….non-existent. This last thing that eliminated one of the main reasons for me placing my son, happened right after the cancelled Christmas visit, and it sent me for a spin.

I’m going to write another post about all of the things that I have discovered, but this post is just to state the fact that just because you read my feelings and thoughts that I write and help me process things relating to placing my son for adoption and a few other details here and there of my life, does NOT mean that you KNOW me, my relationship with my son’s APs, or anything about me being a mom to my daughter, my professional career, my immediate family or anything that happens on the day to day.

You read posts that take anywhere from 20 minutes to 2 hours for me to put together as I process them.
Do not ASSUME you KNOW me. You don’t. You know of a small part of my thoughts.

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About Wsbirthmom

I was a single mom to my elementary aged daughter and in 2011 I became a mother of unnecessary infant adoption loss. No matter how trapped, hopeless, frustrated and overwhelmed I felt before placing my son, all those feelings combined are no comparison to the grief and the loss of him we have felt post-placement. And no one, and nothing could have prepared me for it. I have been forever changed. The old me is gone, dead really, and so is the old life - something no one ever mentioned would happen. This will affect many generations to come, this and so many more adoption truths were never mentioned to me. So many things that could have been disclosed to me that would have allowed me to make a 'fully informed' decision, were kept from me by the agency - Gladney. The things I've learned about the billion dollar adoption industry since losing my son, have opened my eyes to the ever so clever persuasive coercive tactics used by many adoption agencies and attorneys, which I have experienced first hand and didn't even know it was happening, until it was too late. If you need a password for a protected post, please email me at wsbirthmom at g mail dot com. I've been personally cyber stalked and attacked by women who have adopted who I have never met, in an attempt to ruin my children's chance of knowing each other, and they've succeeded along with many other factors. Let's just say, it's been quite a 'ride' - but the ride has taken a hard left turn. I will keep telling my and other natural mothers & sharing adult adoptee's truths of their adoption experiences until the laws are changed and made 'fair' to natural families or until the day I take my last breath here on this earth. I started reaching out to pregnant mothers in crisis who were looking for adoption information. I began helping mothers see that their situations are so temporary and adoption, is a permanent solution - and usually always unnecessary. I've started a grass roots organization called Saving Our Sisters. It is comprised of adopted persons, mothers of adoption loss and even adoptive parents who believe that family preservation should always be the first focus, and that separation by adoption should always be a last last resort. We are PRO #familypreservation, PRO mother and child. If you would like to find us on Facebook, here is the address: https://www.facebook.com/adoptionSOS/
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8 Responses to A couple of hours of blogging does NOT mean you know me…..

  1. Very Well Spoken…and you know that I get every word.

  2. Janine says:

    I am sorry you have had to go through all this crap. Have been thinking and praying for you (((hugs)))

  3. Dana says:

    Anyone who thinks about it for two damn seconds realizes that a snapshot photograph is not representative of the subject’s every move and angle, but is only a split-second’s visual representation of that subject. If you want a more thorough visual representation of a subject you need video, not a static photo.

    It is the same with blogging, from a textual standpoint. And there is no equivalent to video recording when it comes to writing. Once you have written something, it is static and unchanging (well, unless you edit it) and there is no way to continually chronicle everything that goes on in a person’s life. Period. The medium does not allow it.

    Different people have different inspirations for writing, and will therefore represent different aspects of their lives when they are writing. Some write when they’re happy, some when they’re sad, some when triumphant and some when defeated. That does NOT mean that mental state is the only one they ever experience. It only means it’s the mental state they have WRITTEN ABOUT at that particular point in time.

    Anyone who doesn’t understand this needs to get the hell off the Internet before they really hurt somebody. I would highly recommend a round of therapy and some really great drugs, as well.

  4. I’m going to tell you my secret of how to deal with the aggressive ones.
    Keep on calling them out like you are doing. If they send you a nasty email or message, dedicate a whole blog post like this where you speak your point of view and tell them how they are wrong. tackle their stupid points one by one in a calm but factual way. And don’t EVER let them edit your voice or they win.
    Once the see that no matter what they do, no matter what they think, they don’t have anything over you.. they get bored and go away. i hardly ever get trolls or people doing such anymore on my blog since they KNOW what I will do. Sometimes, now, I even miss the hate mail. It was kind of fun.
    Look at it like this.. the more they freak. then you KNOW you are doing something right.. you are threatening them. You are rocking their foundation. They are trying to shut you up. Just keep going! Don’t hide.
    And if you EVER need a place to vent safely.. come see me! I’ll post your stuff any day! I think you are the 2011 version of my 1987 self! ‘Cept smarter. 🙂

    • wsbirthmom says:

      Wow – you said EXACTLY what my approach is/was and will be towards them. I have NOTHING to hide. I password protected my blog until I could get control of the situation. Which, is exactly what I didn’t even need to worry about because, as I found out, if one is HONEST, there is nothing to worry about. Which is exactly how I live. I am honest and for the most part an open book, which is how they were able to get to me. But, as they see…..it DIDN’T WORK. I will be posting more, just has I have done on FB and other media, not to mention filed a cyberstalking chase with my state authorities. As they say…..’It ain’t over until the fat lady sings….’ and at this point…..she hasn’t even begun to warm up yet.

      You have no idea how much I respect you, and all that you have gone through and accomplished over the years. So, your compliment means more than you know. Thank you for the offer, and most of all, the support.

      Keep on keepin’ it ‘real’. It’s the truth, and it needs to be told.

  5. Cristy says:

    I agree with you. Just cause someone reads your blog or the blog down the road doesn’t mean that they know us personally.

  6. gooddaytotry says:

    Hang in there ws. None of us is perfect. But you are owed a debt of graditude. thanks again for your work. you have a child with a group of parents and it is a difficult situation. I don’t know why anyone would try to force you to do something. I am glad you have chutzpah, your child will benefit from that smile.

  7. Katelyn says:

    Growing up my dad would often say….when you assume things you make an ASS out of U and ME… Far too many people are guilty of reading things online and thinking they know the full story. I myself have been guilty of that from time to time. This was a great reminder that we are more than what we blog about or post on social networking sites.

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